Inception

Some early thoughts about the reception on this movie and why it's awesome. No plot points or spoilers, kind of. But, just to be safe, see the god damn movie before reading this. Just for good measure.

Holy shit Batman! It's not a sequel, it's not a comic book movie, it's not a reboot ... it's ... it's a really good movie. Really good. Yes, it blew me away, but I'm not going to deem it my new God. It's up there with the best of 'em, I mean come on, it's a Nolan Flick. A smart, complex, confusing, awesome new world that was dreamed up by Nolan whilst filming Memento (I think.) It's an action-y sci-fi heist-y crime movie. It's not groundbreaking, I mean maybe on some level for visuals, but I mean, groundbreaking? That's going a little far in my opinion.

But yes, it's a fantastic film. Fantastic performances all around, and the story - well, I'm not going to spoil anything - the story is something for you to see for yourself - I'm in no mood to try and explain it in a review of a movie. Review, not recap. Plus, it's like 16 stories in one, and when they say dreams within dreams within dreams, it's exactly like that: complex as hell. It was an an interesting journey - a very fast paced 2 and a half hour complex journey. Nolan has a few old timey movie tricks up his sleeve so that he doesn't completely lose you: isn't it nice when a new guy comes along and asks questions and gets things explained to them? Well, Ellen Page, thank you. The audience needed you. As well as some fun dialogue between Tom Hard's 'Forger' and Josph Gordon-Levitt's 'Point Man.' Again, so much is going on in this movie, but it's not hard to keep track of.

We are constantly taken care of, flashbacks, little pieces of the puzzle being added one at a time, slow motion, little reminders here and there. Twas quite nice. But yes, it's bumpy and aggravating at times - like any crazy movie - it takes time to unravel, you have to have (oh dear god,) patience! Yes, I'm talking to you, bitch three seats to my left texting and constantly checking the time. (Insert rant about how idiotic and rude and disrespectful and annoying that is HERE.)

Now, we are going to dive in to the people who are going to compare Inception to the Dark Knight. Here is a fact, just to get it out of the way, because you know, people probably don't already know: this movie IS NOT the Dark Knight. In some respects, this film is better than the Dark Knight, and in others, the Dark Knight wins. Big fucking surprise! In two years you'll get your next Batman installment, so just fucking hold tight and stop bitching. Anyway, while the emotional core of this movie is considered 'weak' by some, and I understand why, because in some sense it is pretty weak, but I got by that, I let that go and kept following the story. Nolan is a fantastic director and writer when it comes to the emotional core of a story. I mean look at Harvey effin Dent from DK. We all understood what had happened to him, we related to that, and it was emotionally devastating, which makes the end of that movie work ... well the entire movie actually. Now when comparing the emotional core, DK wins, but again, don't compare, two different movies. Entirely.

This movie is beautiful. The anti-gravity, the whole dream thing - how it works, the rules, the everything. It was nice. However, on another level, personally, I have had some pretty fucked up dreams. And some pretty fucking awesome dreams. In comparison, Nolan's dream world was pretty tame. It had to be realistic, and I understood that, it was a realistic setting, realistic movie - there was no room for unicorns and talking plants, and flying projections of your mother saying you're not good enough and such. I'm glad nobody is going into my head. A little part of me wanted to see all the dream craziness, but that's a different movie. For this movie, I bought it and it worked. I was thrown into THAT world, and for 2 and a half hours, nothing else mattered. I'm an escapist at heart, so I was at home during this flick. A good chunk of people will see this movie a second and third time. I have only seen it twice, and I plan on going only once more. The second time I caught more things, understood shit a boat load better, and I enjoyed it just as much.

The ending ... well, it's a decent ending. Leaves you with two sides. (Actually, it's kind of funny. You know that Shyamalan-ish, soap opera-y, "it was just a dream" fake out concept? Yah, well, usually it's a fairly negative thing, a complaint, but here? Here it works.) You will leave the theater talking. Debating. Arguing. Explaining. And that is fantastic! A movie that makes you think! Holy shit! It makes you think the entire way through, it makes you concentrate! And please, when the screen goes blank and the credits start to roll, listen. Just listen. You'll know everybody's response by the noise they make. I heard groaning, quite a few yes's, a few no's, an awwwww or two, a lot of silence, and several neutral guttural noises.

See it in IMAX. Totally worth it. Yeah, it's not in 3D, no heavy crazy IMAX cameras were used, but just the [hate to say it] IMAX experience is worth it. For the score and soundtrack alone, it's worth it. Hans Zimmer's the man. Johnny Marr, too. Oh yeah, and Edith Piaf. Haha Marion Cotillard. Does Nolan do commentaries? There better be one and some kick ass special features on la DVD. Don't wait for DVD on this one, if you must, see it in a regular theater. Nothing will beat that experience.

So, put on your thinking cap, prepare for a mind fuck, some great acting, masterful story telling, and a good time.

Moviegasm

I don't see a MySpace movie coming out anytime soon. Tom is too boring.

How long would a movie about Twitter be?

Due to its awesomeness, this trailer deserves it's own post.

Ooooh Jesse Eisenberg! So awkward and neurotic and DREAMY!

I bring you David Fincher's The Social Network!

May I also point out the spooky rendition of Creep by Radiohead that hovers in the background.

HTML is being a bitch so click here to see the trailer. Or here. Or here. Click here. Either or. One of them might be porn. Enjoy!

Back in Black [and Blue]

Side note: I'm currently on pain killers from an operation I had on a whole in my face, (you know, the one that talks,) and I'm still a little black and blue from the surgery. Please pardon any lack of sassyness or sarcasm in this post. If anything, I won't remember posting this because of the acid-like high I'm on right now. Candy canes! See, I have no idea what I'm saying.

This should be fun.

Seriously though, where the fuck am I?

Anyway, the summer of 2010 is well underway, along with blockbusters and shit bombs, and trailers for the Fall season! One of the only movies this summer that I'm anticipating, Inception, is coming to theaters on Friday. So, before that total mindfuck and review, I'd thought I'd point out other stuff that I recently got excited for. There will be some major linkage down below because I don't want to murder this post with a billion trailers.

First up, let's get Galifianakis out of the way. Yes, The Hangover was pretty funny, but oh by the Gods of IMDB do not let us forget his early works: that's right, I'm looking at you Corky Romano, Bubble Boy, and Out Cold!

1. Dinner For Schmucks - All you had to say was Paul Rudd. He will play a good straight-man against Steve Carrell and Galifianakis' oddball characters. Watch both trailers.
2. Due Date - Yes, next project from the director of la Hangover, Todd Phillips. It's a kind of buddy-comedy but everything goes wrong road-trip hybrid. Plus there's Robbie Downey Jr and Galifianakis! They are both on rolls. [Roles?]
   
3. And the last Galifianakis project: It's Kind of a Funny Story. This one is trailer on the page worthy:

For this next group of flicks, I'm just going to be spitting them out like ... thinks that liked to be spit out. [Lindsay Lohan knows what I mean.] Just the title, the link, and then three or four extra words and names, you know, for pizazz. PIZAZZ!

The Other Guys - Will Ferrell being loud. Surprise. And Wahlberg, Mark Wahlberg.

Scott Pilgrim VS The World - Edgar Wright - 'nough said.

Let Me In - The sad kid from The Road. And the director of Cloverfield. And vampires.

Get Low - Bill Murray - 'nough said

The Adjustment Bureau - Just plain old mildly interested in this one. Mildly.

RED - John Malkovich as John Malkovich in: John Malkovich. Helen Mirren is a fox.

Devil - M. Night. Shama-suck is involved with this one. The trailer is ... surprisingly spooky - oh god, he's just getting my hopes up again. DAMN YOU!

And if there is one thing that this post has taught me, always fully watch/check the link before you post it. Always.

Fucking YouTube.

Funny Things That I Think Are Funny [12]

Oh, wait, Stalin was just a jerk? Ohhhhhhh - that explains it. This is funny for the sole reason of it's stupidity. People are dumb. What's left of the History Major inside of me just EXPLODED.

Spring has Sprong!

Or is it sprang? Sprung? Spring - wait, no. Spryng? Well shit. The weather is getting nicer - fuck it. Here is a pretty picture of flowers and maybe a kitten:

I think I may vomit.

Well anyway, just in time for Spring, here is a movie review. It involves all things spring: medical students on spring break, the Norwegian Alps, snow, zombies, Nazi's, and Nazi-Zombies.

Zombies: oh yes, I do enjoy a good zombie film. Nazis: I am quite the history buff and I do enjoy Hitler and his shenanigans. Wait, these two things together? Nazi-Zombies? HELL YES! This movie was cliche-tastic! This flick embraced them, exploited them, made reference to a few of them, and made it look ultra-gory-licious. Many people are saying this is a clear rip-off of Evil Dead 1 & 2 and apparently there is a WWII video game with Nazi Zombies ... but I say you can never get enough Nazi-Zombies, and when one wants to include them in any aspect of entertainment: DO IT!

The movie itself in dialogue references Evil Dead 1 & 2, and there are some awesome deaths, [with one in particular that is quite Evil Dead-ish,] so this movie is more of an homage to that flick and other films like it. The walking cliche, Erlend (a fat funny guy obsessed with movies - who has sex first ... hint hint,) is even wearing a "Brain Dead" t-shirt!!! Brain Dead aka Dead Alive aka my all time favorite Peter Jackson movie and classic horror comedy shtick flick.

I said 'Dead Alive' - not the band Dead or Alive. Shit.

You spin me right round baby right round! One of my favorite cliche-erific moments was when the few cabin mates left decide to split up. Not only does that mean certain death, but the two that leave the cabin then think about splitting up themselves!! That's double the death! So, if you like your horror movies cliche-tastic-erific, funny, subtitled, gory, and quite snowy, you are in luck sir.

I can't tell you how many times any given character heard a noise far away, said "Hello? Anybody there?" or said the another characters name and then investigated it further. I lost count after the 6th time. Yes, and it had one of my favorite, slightly under-used cliche, the accidental death, or the "whoopsy daisy," as Daniel Day-Lewis might say. PS: one of the actors names is Stig Frode Henriksen. Really. That is his name. By the way, the opening scene of this moofie was fantastic. Or it just could be my love for classical music and chase sequences.

Alice in Whatderland

Alice in ... Wonderland? Underland? Whatderland?

Just to get this out of the way: I'm done with people complaining about how this film wasn't 'Tim Burton-y enough' or it was 'light/diet Tim Burton.' I'm not saying this is like at-his-best wacky Beetlejuice or Eddie Scissorhands Tim Burton, but it's far better than [dare I speak of it,] Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Yes, goths and Hot Topic-tards are going to rejoice with the black & white striped clothing that will be released, with a splash of red here and there, but who are you to judge what is and isn't Tim Burton? I think that's up to his fucked up head if you ask me.

The movie-film wasn't as dark as Sweeney [uh, hello PG rating] but it wasn't as bright and fantastical as Charlie and the Shit Factory. Fantastical maybe, but still dark. The start of the flick really excited me - it was like a Victorian-ish Kandinsky painting - with not people walking around, but over-the-top character-nitwits snobbing it up left and right as an absurdist portrait of a fancy time. Leo Bill [who played the ginger twit in the beginning and end] was delightful - a perfect caricature for a Tim Burton film. He was also in Tarsem's 'The Fall' - another visually astonishing flick.

Performance wise, you have Sir Jonathan Depp, so you kind of know what you are getting into. Also, it's Depp in a Burton flick, so you should really know what you are getting into. It's Depp for the sake of Depp - no complaints, but nothing miraculous either. The mood changing eyes and somebody always having to stop him before he goes bonkers was a nice touch. I also liked the red hair. His face bothered me quite a bit though - twas a little too stagey for me. If this was a play, it would have looked spectacular, the paleness, the cheekbones sticking out and the eyes - wow! But on film, it didn't transfer over that well to me. And besides the audibility problems, it was just OK.

I have heard wonders about Mia Bom Chicka Wawasikowska. [Fuck you Papp for getting to the word play of her last name before I could.] I have also heard about how Anne Hathaway blows. I am actually quite the opposite. I didn't have too too much of a problem with la White Queen, yes things here and there like all the gesturing and faces - but, on the other hand, we have Alice. Nothing really blew me away about Alice. I saw acting - I saw her acting - it was quite upsetting actually. You are not supposed to see acting in a movie - especially in a really good one.

I adored everything about Helena Bonham Carters' Red Queen. Besides the whole being the play-thing of the director, the role did really suit her. Perfectly over-the-top and she stole every scene she was in. Her court really did just slap me with awesomeness and I was in awe. From the monkeys holding candles and tables and such, the frogs and pigs and fish in suits, oh and the people behind her. Perfect. The other over-sized body parts were just fantastic. Ears, nose, stomach, ta-tas, and chins and foreheads and such. They didn't speak much, but visually, they packed a punch.

I wonder if Depp or Burton asked Crispin about his role in Epic Movie.

Crispin Glover. Oh, where do we begin? Besides being one of the only visual things that took me out of Wonderland, [Underland? Meh, fuck it,] he was just blehck. He is lanky and gangly already, so why add a few unnecessary feet to him? He actually wraps his "arm" around Depp's neck in one scene, and it just looked fake. Fake is a harsh term for a CGI-heavy movie - and I only wanted to use it once. He reminded me of a goth Gumby. [Fuck you Papp again for making the Back to the Future reference before I could.] I have start seeing movies sooner. Jeez.

Other performance thoughts: I guess I just wanted more Cheshire Cat, less Doormouse, A LOT more March Hare [my favorite side-character by far - the tea-party side had me chuckling like crazy,] I was fine with the Caterpillar, more lines for Matt Lucas would have been nice, (the Tweedle's were underused,) the White Rabbit was fine, the Dodo bird was forgettable, Timmy Spall's Bayard the hound was delightful, more flower people would be preferable, and finally I think I would have been content if the Jabberwocky stayed silent. Maybe they should have lent Christopher Lee's voice to the Bandersnatch. Burton had to get him in there somewhere I suppose. Anyway, I'm pretty sure if there were more of the supporting characters, that would make them not 'supporting' anymore and I suppose they would over shadow Alice MORE than they already do.

I'm pretty sure they only reason it was in 3D was because of Avatar and so that the March Hare could throw things at the audience and people could go "Whoa!" Danny Elfman's score was pretty tame, and I'm ignoring the Avril Lavigne song used for the credits. I'm a sucker for chess and playing card themed shit. I was in heaven. I also hope that Tim Burton stays away from The Addams Family. Talks are that he wants to do a stop-motion type thing and get back into that, which is a little better than a live-action or 3D version.

Yes, the story is sacrificed over a copper bowl of goat's blood so that we could be bedazzled and shma-shmazed visually, and boy does it bedazzle, but this flick does fall into some old patterns. While some think that the flick isn't Burton enough, I think it's just fine. Alice has to jump onto floating dead people's faces to get across the moat to the Red Queen's castle. Really? Not Burton enough for you? How about we throw in a Knave of Hearts rape scene? Will that satisfy your urge? The film is entertaining. It's just what I needed. I am quite the escapist, and it was nice to be transported to the creepy perverted mind of Lewis Carroll and the demented brain of Tim Burton. Besides a few dance bits at the end of the movie that I am erasing from my head, it was enjoyable.

Funny Things I Think Are Funny [11]

I want a lamb. RIGHT NOW.



I really really need to buy a farm or some animals or something. There will be cute videos and pictures flying out of this blog like nobody's business!

I also need to buy a gun - to shoot the woman speaking in this video. Maybe the lamb was trying to get away from her hideous shriek of a voice.